The Best Leaders Are Thankful Ones

Give Thanks

I would maintain that thanks are the highest form of thought, and that gratitude is happiness doubled by wonder.” – G.K. Chesterton.

Give ThanksI’m a Thanksgiving Day fan. I like the pies a lot. Plural. I can eat a lot of pie.

I also really like the idea of the day. I like how the holiday escapes most holiday craziness. Unlike the history, it stays simple and focused.

The actual history is more compelling and complicated than what makes it into the typical school play.

Just over 500 years ago, a man called Squanto, from the Pawtuxet tribe, in what we now call New England had been kidnapped by an English adventurer. He was brought to Spain to be sold as a slave.

He somehow escaped to England where he learned English. There he built a relationship with a merchant. It took him about six years and then he was finally able to make it back across the Atlantic to get home.

He arrived back about a year before the Pilgrims did. He traveled to his village to be reunited with his family. They were all dead. He discovered that village and family had all been wiped out by a disease.

He had no one. He was alone. It’s difficult to imagine how he processed this or how he felt.

Then, the next year, 1620, the Pilgrims arrived.

To escape religious persecution, the Pilgrims crossed the stormy Atlantic. They were poorly prepared for what they were to experience.

The passenger deck of the Mayflower was about 1500 square feet. And only five feet high. That’s like a roomy crawl space.

There were 102 passengers. Plus 30 crew. Even if the full top deck was available, imagine 130 people in your house. For 66 days.

When they arrived, they had no housing or food. Most stayed on the ship that first winter.

Half of them died from exposure, malnutrition, and disease.

When spring finally came around, the survivors went ashore. They set up at the abandoned summer camp of Squanto’s village.

Unbelievably, they were welcomed, in English, by a native man from Abenaki tribe. He introduced them to Squanto.

Squanto, a man who clearly knew how to make the best of bad situations, befriended the Pilgrims.

He taught and coached them how to make a new life. They had no food until harvest and didn’t know how to forage. Squanto taught them how to survive off the land until harvest came.

The seeds they brought from Europe wouldn’t grow. They needed the crop not only for survival – but they had to pay a loan off to the corporation that had funded their journey. (Imagine having major debt hanging over your head when physical survival is the pressing issue.)

Squanto taught them local agriculture. He helped them build a relationship and an alliance with the neighboring Wampanoag tribe.

That first autumn, the surviving half of the Pilgrims invited members of the Wampanoag tribe to celebrate, what is traditionally considered, the first Thanksgiving dinner.

There is so much struggle and suffering throughout the story. It creates a startling contrast to the friendship they experienced and the attitude they chose: To be grateful.

It’s also interesting that it was over 300 years before President Lincoln, in the height of the Civil War officially created what we now call Thanksgiving Day. In his proclamation, has asked God to “commend to his tender care all those who have become widows, orphans, mourners or sufferers in the lamentable civil strife.”

Thanksgiving was called for in the middle of difficulty, challenge, and discouragement.

The Best Leaders Are Built with Gratitude

Life can be challenging. Business can be difficult. Leadership can be trying.

The best leaders experience this too. They choose to be thankful. To express gratitude.

Gratitude is a powerful force. The best leaders learn to practice it.  Gratitude, more than anything, is a way of interpreting our experiences.

Gratitude requires humility. It is an acknowledgment that we are the recipients of something good. That someone else has given us something – that couldn’t be bought.

Gratitude makes happiness possible. Without it – happiness is always someone else’s greener grass.

Gratitude makes fulfillment possible. It allows us to experience contentment while retaining ambition.

When we are grateful – we, necessarily, shave away at comparisons between success, at envy, at an unhealthy striving to bolster our own fragile egos.

The science around gratitude shows that people who consistently practice it are healthier, both physically and mentally. They are more positive and happy. They experienced better relationships. They treat others better.

Notably, gratitude comes first. The benefits follow.

As in the Thanksgiving story above, gratitude is often birthed in the soil of loss, pain, and disappointment.

Gratitude is a choice. It’s not a reaction to everything going right.

It’s a choice that the best leaders will make. To recognize that we aren’t entirely in control. That we aren’t entirely self-made.

The Best Leaders Build Others with Gratitude

Many people, myself included, can feel awkward around showing appreciation. This is strange given that people like it.

The best leaders become natural at showing appreciation. As a result, those you lead:

  • Are more likely to demonstrate loyalty and be engaged in their work.
  • Feel safer to bring concerns, mistakes or problems up to you. This allows for faster correction and growth.
  • Experience more happiness as they learn to see through a lens of gratefulness and appreciation.
  • Are empowered as they learn to identify and engage their strengths and the value they bring.

Practicing Gratitude

Here are three ways that I try to practice Gratitude on a regular basis. It takes three, maybe five minutes.

One a daily basis:

  1. Write down Three Gratitudes. Three things that you are grateful for. As you practice this, you’ll start to discover more and more in your life that you are grateful for.
  2. Express Appreciation one time each day. Tell one person something you like or appreciate or are grateful for about them.

When you are struggling with a situation or person or attitude:

  1. Write a list of Ten Gratitudes. I think of think of ten things I’ve grateful for in the situation or about that person. I have never been able to get to the end of this list and not find that my entire perspective has changed.

This changed perspective allows me to make different choices, which allows for positive results.

What I’m Grateful For

This Thanksgiving, I’m grateful to Jesus Christ for what I experience as his patience and guidance. I’m grateful to my wife, Marta, who is such a solid partner as we learn to parent, build businesses and make a life together. I’m grateful for my children who are such a source of joy and wonder. I’m grateful for my parents who’ve been such great grandparents.

I’m grateful for my clients and readers. My clients inspire me with their creativity, drive, and pursuit of excellence. My readers inspire me with their interest in not only growing as leaders but growing as people.

Thank you! Happy Thanksgiving!

Christian

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